Benevolent Tippers!

Dwayne (7), Jimer (6), JT (7), Rodger (6), Steeky (6), T Kane (6), Jenks (7), Thommo (7), Cush (7), Tippers (6), Matty (5) (Sub: Maggers 66mins 7). Subs (not used): O Kane, Ruddy, Ferguson, Kyley.

Man of the match: Cush

Referee: Raymond Hetherington 4

There was a story doing  the rounds of the rumour mill, that United striker Tippers, was being tipped to be the next manager of Portadown. In truth he played like he was on their side yesterday, missing two sitters and they were sitters, which would have given United the points and moved them up above the Ports in the table and given us some confidence, as we must go to Chickenville and the hatchet men in our next two games, sandwiched in between, is a trip to Larne for the County Antrim Shield semi-final.

As expected Spike made wholesale changes to his starting line-up of last Wednesday's defeat to derby rivals, the Coleraine scum. Out went Kyley and Ruddy from defence and in came JT and Steeky. He went back to his favoured 4,3,3, formation or was that to match the Ports, I'll probably never know. Owen Kane, Faulkner, Maggers and the Barber were replaced by Thommo, Cush, Tippers and young Matty. The Barber and Faulkner didn't even make the bench.

As a result of playing 4,3,3, I thought we were too narrow and bread and butter for the Ports defence aided and abetted with incompetent officials. Referee Heth, is well known to United fans as he makes some funny decisions, especially when you are playing teams from the west of the province. Eight mins into the game, Garret, of Ports went in two-footed on Thommo, a red card offence. Heth, merely talked to him and no cards, it surely deserved a yellow at least.

Not to be outdone Twigg of Ports, elbowed JT and Heth, gave him a good telling off and he was allowed to continue on his merry way, without picking up as much as a yellow card. Tony Kane, obviously thought it was Christmas and he went in late on Casement, of the Ports and to be fair Heth, only lectured him as well. The Lino, on our side of the pitch, the 'home' stand, firstly seemed to be confused with the offside rule in the first-half.

He only flagged for one offside, during the first-half and that was only because somebody in the home stand shouted 'offside', I think. In the second -half, he flagged two times when Tippers didn't even try for the ball and gave two goal-kicks, that were blatant corners. But every cloud has a silver lining and he missed Tippers being offside after 75 mins and we scored from his cross. It was no more than we deserved, but it looked as if we were going to be pointless.

The first-half was a dull affair, both teams struggled on the heavy surface and playing young Matty wide didn't work as he was well below par for most of the game. There was only one real chance of note and that was that man Twigg, who nearly scored with a 30 yard shot which Dwayne diverted for a corner. Two mins previous to this chance, Sammy and me were having a bit a bit of banter, when United won a free-kick about 25 yards from goal.

Sammy said and I had to laugh, that just for a change, Tony, would roll the ball to Cush and Cush, would hit the Ports defensive wall and this is what happened. But the power of the shot took it towards goal and Miskelly (hereafter called Miz), in the Ports goal saved with his legs. Not be to outdone, Tippers set up Jenks with 35 mins gone, but the big Scotsman could only hit the side-netting, a real chance gone begging. 

Captain Jimer, nearly sold the ranch, when he tried a back-pass approaching halftime and played it to the lurking Twigg. Dwayne, rushed from his line and Twigg, tried to back-heel to his strike partner Murray and proved he is no 'Paul Hardy' as he made a mess of it and United survived much Captain Jimer's relief I'm sure. Moments later, after we had the Lino's flag for the first offside at the Fisherwick end, Heth, brought the half to a close and some of us went down for the halftime cuppa.

Those that were left were speculating if Spike, was bringing on Maggers, who seemed to be loosening up as it was obvious there needed to be changes or a different formation as we had created little in the first-half. As I said earlier, there was also the rumour about Tippers and Ports were reportedly asking United to cancel his contract so he could take up duties immediately. Sammy said maybe we could do a swap for Twigg, the most expensive groundsman man in Ireland, but he would have take a massive pay cut and he didn't see that happening!

2nd half

Ten mins into the 2nd half, the Ports broke the deadlock, when Twigg got away from our defence and sidestepped the onrushing Dwayne, who steered him out wide. But Twigg, was not closed down by any of our defenders and he was able to pass to his team-mate, Mackie and he stooped to head into the unguarded net. Was Dwayne, wrong to rush from his goal and try to confront Twigg? I honestly don't know, but he made the decision and he was unlucky in this instance and Ports went into the lead 1-0.

Two mins later it should have been 2-0, when Murray, headed wide when our defenders went asleep yet again, proof if proof were needed, that we need to sign a central defender, pronto. It was obvious that a change would have to be made or changes but Fergie, dithered, until our fans in desperation encouraged him to change 'this s--t' and he acted on this suggestion. He took off young Matty, who was struggling in this formation and brought on Maggers and we started to play a bit and not before time.

A clever bit of play down on right saw Cush, sling over an inch perfect cross to Tippers, at the far post and he could only side-foot ball wide, with Miz, stranded on his goal-line, an awful miss. Then we had two offsides against Tippers, when he made no attempt to go for the ball and the two blatant corners that the Lino gave as goal-kicks. But just when I thought its not going to be United's day, the Lino missed Tippers in an offside position and he when he crossed, Cush, headed it on and Jenks, sent a header into the net past Miz, to draw United level at 1-1.

Could we go on and win it I foolishly thought, but I think Spike was happy with a point and anyway we had no potential match-winner on our bench that was going to come on and grab the game by the 'scruff of the neck' and propel us to victory. In fact it was the Ports, who very nearly grabbed victory when central defender Oman's header bounced on the crossbar. At the other end, Maggers, set up Tippers again and he fluffed his lines once again and he only needed a touch, but he messed up.

The announcement came over the speaker, that the ref had added 3 mins stoppage time and I thought the was up but Sammy, was at pains to point out that the clock said 2 mins 43 seconds, when we won a corner on the right. When this corner was cleared, Heth blew his whistle to end the game and still we had the the clock saying 2 mins and 52 seconds, yet again we didn't get at least the three mins that we were supposed to get, but that's neither here or there, we had missed our chance to go up a place much as we had missed our chances to score!